weeks five + six: strawberry edition

even though we didn’t get much snow this year, it was still winter at the pitcher house.
and how do I know this?
1) I had the uncontrollable itch to re-arrange, re-decorate, and just shake things up in general around the house.

we moved the two youngest upstairs in the loft area, moved their tv room downstairs, and my studio from the basement up to peyton’s old room on the main level. the hopes are that now, every little girl in the house will sleep through the night (I know, 11, 9, and 6.. they got on a fear kick in october, and it still isn’t over), and the other hope is that I will get some of my fun stuff done. it’s not fun going down to the basement alone. where no one else is. to work. where it was not motivating.

(my studio is still a work in progress.. but it is progressing.)

we were also tv starts for a second on a local show, studio 5.

(link to segment here.)

my nephew was baptized.

we enjoyed too much sweet stuff on superbowl sunday (but seriously, that is what the superbowl is all about..).

took a trip to the natural history museum of utah, which was AWESOME and totally AMAZING, and WE WILL be going back. there was so much incredible stuff to see, and we didn’t even get close to seeing it all.

the last little bit is a homework sheet from peyton’s homework packet. I LOVE the phonetic spelling.. her favorite season: summer. things you wear in summer: “swimsoot”. I LOVE this!

and 2) three pictures from this particular week have to do with different people being ill.
seriously.
the ONLY thing I hate (absolutely HATE!!!) about winter.

lynn participated in her first science fair. we tested gum. our jaws are still recovering.

(but 5 gum is the best, in case you are curious.)

took ash to the doctor for what I suspected was strep. it was just a virus (which = a wasted co-pay).

took peyton in to the instacare the next day, for the flu.

wick girls = drama + emotion. this was a quiet moment.

got some sweet thank you gifts from teresa hunsaker for the studio 5 segment. she is SUCH a SWEETHEART!!

this is peyton’s fever.. back again.

took lynn to the 5th grade maturation program and traditional ice cream and “ask me anything you want” afterward.

page 1 credits:

becky higgins project life template “F”

strawberry edition project life

kraft paper and paint brush from liv.edesigns

number 5 from sarah gleason

staples from dani mogstad

paper heart from amy tangerine

stitches from crystal wilkerson

page 2 credits:

becky higgins project life template “F”

strawberry edition project life

staples from dani mogstad

stitched heart from crystal wilkerson

arrow from clementine edition project life

fonts:

“week” bebas

“six” lobster two

journaling and dates done in frenchy

project life failure

my intentions were good. oh soooo good!!

I started out strong, just not strong enough.

now I am living with the decisions I made, and trying to catch up!

I set out to do project life, and got some pretty awesome tips to “help” me. some of them ended-up giving me excuses, and thousands of ideas as to why I should just start all over, but I am not. I am sticking to it. I will get there, slowly but surely.

so the things that i have learned, some the hard way, tinged with a smidge of regret, are as follows: (and i learned A LOT from cathy zileski, she is amazing!!)

- pick a template, maybe two, but the fewer the better.

- pick a kit and try to stick to it. there were fun cards and embellishments from my stash that i was able to use to mix it up a bit, but for the most part, too many choices just complicate things for me, and project life is not supposed to be complicated. i actually created a folder on my computer, and titled it "my project life" and copied the supplies i wanted to use continually throughout the album. for the most part, my background paper and fonts stayed the same. so did my template. i also edited my pictures the exact same way every time.

- calendar in a day when you project life it. have that time consistent so it gets done.

- i keep a journal on my phone with the day one app. every day i write about the events of the day, that helps when i go to journal.

- be flexible. i missed a few weeks, and that was hard to go back and fill in the gaps. when life just got too busy, i stopped. i still have catching up to do, and if i just started out being flexible with myself, i wouldn't be there. i also picked one way to start the album, one basic style to stick to, and i just wasn't loving it anymore come march. when you don't love what you are working with, you should be flexible to change it up. i wanted to keep the album cohesive, but i should have allowed myself to be more flexible so i would have stayed excited and in love with the process.

- involve your kids!! that is part of the plan for me this year. let them journal about the day or a certain event. after watching the rebroadcast of project life on creative live, i have so much motivation and new ideas to help keep this ongoing. scanning in kids art and school work is something that i want to implement.

- accountability. i have let my blog go, i don't post in galleries like i used to, and if i did, there would be some accountability. i wouldn't get behind.

I have a few weeks completed from last year, I still have A LOT of catching up to do, but it isn’t hard. two things that saved me: my photo 365 app and my day one journaling app. those were two things I was very consistent about, and now I have both of them to fall back on to fill in the many gaps of 2013.

so where should i start?

let’s see..

it’s been about, 5, almost six months?

that sound right?

yeah, well.

i will try to explain. try.

life kind of came apart back in august. I lived for the end of the summer, tried to fill it with fun and perfect everything for my girls, tried me hardest to make every last minute worth it, for me and for them.

with the girls going back to school, I was plenty emotional. like, that is an understatement. I cannot recall a year that was harder on me.

I mean, it’s always hard, and I always miss them, but this first day, I cried more than I think I ever did.

and it didn’t get any easier the next week when this one went to kindergarten.

along with these already anticipated blows, came another unanticipated blow.

my husband decided that he was done with church.

and I decided to keep it a secret until december. awesome christmas gift, am I right?

I really shouldn’t say that it was unanticipated, because, as I look back on it all (you know, because hindsight is always 20/20 and so forth), there were indications, I was just living in denial. it was either denial or an incredible state of hope.

I also started working.

I swore I would never do that as long as I had kids at home, but circumstances being as they were, I desired a) something to fill my time while peyton was gone for half of the day. and 2) I still wanted to be able to receive the blessings of tithing. I need them.

so as life was as it was, I lost all steam to do those things that make me, me.

I stopped scrapbooking.

stopped taking pictures.

stopped exercising.

stopped blogging.

stopped making treats.

(which was actually a very nice pairing to the whole not exercising bit.)

I stopped doing so many of the things that I thoroughly enjoyed, because I was so sad. I felt hopeless. I felt like everything that I had worked for for the majority of my life was falling apart, it wasn’t perfect, and I didn’t want to put this broken mess out there for the world. not for attention, not for pity, I just didn’t have the energy or the desire.

it sucked.

and as I look back on it all, I can recognize a very depressed girl.

I am trying to turn that around.

I am taking time for myself, trying to make time, and desire, to do the things I have always enjoyed.

don’t get me wrong, those voids were filled with some very good things too. as a side effect of my husband’s choice: my testimony is pretty dang awesome. it is going through this fortification process that is amazing. it is awesome to see how my heavenly father is blessing me in every moment.

I have friends, some I have never met in real life, who encourage me. they have NO IDEA what I am going through, but they are there (bugging me to get back at it.. ahem.. missy). I have friends from my past, just show up at just the right time, able to say just what I need to hear, not having a clue the blessing they are to me.

and let’s not get started on family. I have THE BEST. my dad and brothers have been ready to come and help me and my girls when we need the priesthood. my in-laws are wonderful and supportive and loving. my sweet sister-in-law (one of those sweet sisters-in-law anyway) told me back in december that I needed to start blogging again. she said something like, “you aren’t the only woman that is going through this. imagine the strength you can be to them, and them to you.”

I know I am not alone.

I really didn’t intend for this to be a tell-all of the drama in the pitcher house.

I just needed to do it, and stop putting it off.

I have a whole list in my head, all the reasons to wait. take new pictures of the girls.. make a new header.. get a few more project life layouts done. try to think of anything more to say than the despair and sadness I feel so often….

but I'm here.

and it feels pretty darn good.

trying to hold back tears..

so things change.

babies grow, people die, time passes waaay too fast, and as women, we have hormones.

my hormones are at this very moment on the emotional up-swing.  it’s fabulous. 

(we are all thankful that I can step back and realize that it is hormones…)

so while I created these layouts earlier in the week, when my hormones were doing other things to my body, as I look at them now, I want to cry!!!

so we’ll get through this quickly…

first up is “grandpa’s chair” using goodies from liv, including her newest, brownbagger paper pack vol. 5.

I could NEVER get enough of her brownbagger papers…  NEVER.

(for full credits click on the layout.)

this second one is only four years old (ppffttt…), but this is what digital project life is so good for!!  catching up in a fast, easy, gorgeous way!

this layout I used becky’s “p” template (perfect for little peyton..), “honey” edition cards, “baby” paper,  stitching from anna aspnes, staples from liv, and that fun baker’s twine from splendid fiins.

okay..  so I am not going to look at these for at least another week, try to block out the fact that school will be starting again this month (aaaakkkk!!!!), and just try to do things that are fun, non-tear inducing.

this is going to be hard…

did I mention that it’s really the hormones fault?

#suckyprocrastinator

that is the hashtag of hashtags right there…

but it’s summer, that’s my excuse.

many things have been placed on the back-burner, so to speak, one of them blogging.

the bathroom re-do is at a partially painted stand-still.

photo sessions have been a once a month event.

laundry doesn’t get put away in a timely manner.

anything to do with this old computer contraption is definitely not at the top of my list..

these have all been replaced with my girls.  we are living it up!!  swimming is at it’s best.  play is constant.  we are loving the sun.  I have actually said out loud that I *might* just be “tan enough”.

(but you’ll probably find me out in the sun tomorrow anyway.)

oh my heavens..  reading has even fallen a bit lower on the list of preferred activities!

(gasp!)

we are thankful that these summer days are passing by so slowly, but I do realize that these days are numbered.

before I know it, all three (ALL 3!!!) will be at school, and these days will be put on hold, and I will miss them violently.

making the most of it…

so, with the excuses all laid out there, here’s what I should have done before, but are done now:

week before last, liv fed my addiction for arrows.

(click on layouts for full list of credits + links to products used.)

then last week, she encouraged my obsession with chalkboard.

and this week, it’s more paintbrushes.

I also thought I would enter a little contest at pixels & company..

it is called “cropped”, and I was cropped.

oh, well, leaves more time to swim.

tagged for life.

liv’s newness today are these fabulous fabric tags.

(say that five times fast.)

as you can see, I am still incredibly in love with the woodoodled papers too..

(click on the layout for full list of credits.)

I am still just so in love with this pic!!

I did touch it up, just a smidge.  like removing the speakers that were in the background..  I am a little anal that way.  it was a spontaneous shot, I didn’t want it to be too posed or orchestrated, so those things that end up bugging me when all is said and done need to be dealt with afterwards.

it’s the way I am.

I have this relationship with photoshop that I thought I would never have.  I was SO AFRIAD of it!!  but I can tell you, that getting my feet wet with photo editing was what got me comfortable and excited.

I think we all know that I got that start at jessicasprague.com.

(and if you didn’t know that, well, welcome to my blog!!)

jess is doing her yearly free class, to help us all learn, for the experienced ones, it helps us to get excited, for the newbies, it helps show them that this is possible!!

I have signed up, you should too!!

among other things going on here..

I am up to my neck in soccer stuff.  I am the newest (insert title here that has to do with age group coordinating) with our region AYSO board.  my two youngest love soccer!!  it takes involved parents to make it happen.  seriously, in EVERY SINGLE AREA.  if you have kiddos who love something, get involved.  it makes their experience so much better.

we finished our last day of little laker cheer in prep for the parade tomorrow. 

yesterday, peyton wasn’t really much about the whole “participation” thing, aside from clapping. 

today I might have bribed her with a slurpee if she would just raise her hands!!!

she did.

lynn was selected to be the filer for their little stunting group.  she loves it.  all she has been doing for the past 24 hours now is cheering.

she is sad that today is the last day.

we’ve also had a couple of days of dam fun.

and the bathroom re-do has begun.

it is such a wonderful sight to look up, and have WHITE ceilings!!

that’s right, there is an “s” on the end of ceiling..  I decided that while I was at it, I might as well tackle the ceiling in our master bathroom too.  I mean, I did do our bedroom last summer.  it might be about time..

I only wish I dared (i.e. had the energy) to paint ALL of the ceilings white…  6 down, 6 more to go?

so we are saying farewell to “botany beige” (we won’t “miss” it, since it is ALL OVER THE REST OF THE FREAKING HOUSE.  (someday…)  and hello to “turquoise mist”.

we are having so much fun this summer!!  I am so happy with how slowly it is going.  I just love having the girls all home, having non-stop fun, and little drama.

we are making the most of it, and wearing ourselves out  most days..

(if this post seems a little dejavu-ish to you, well, that’s probably because you saw all of this already on instagram, and I would apologize, but hey, now you have the story to go with it, right?)

(you’re welcome.)

some newness, some oldness, some awesomeness…

shall we start with the newness?

let us..

AC Digitals has some newness in store today:  Crate Paper -  Maggie Holmes collection.

perfection in softness, femininity, and fun.

I just love this photo of peyton, in fact, I have loved all of the photos of her that I took in this little sitting of sorts. 

she’s gorgeous.

(no, I am not biased.)

(papers and embellishments are from maggie holmes collection, tape frame from liv.edesigns, staples from design by dani, and stitching from anna aspnes.)

speaking of lovely things, father’s day was quite lovely.

this “merrill working seven days a week” thing was old the minute it started, and hasn’t gotten any newer or more exciting since then. 

I have been having a hard time with it, and he has too. 

yesterday wasn’t easy for either one of us.

I sat on our bench in sacrament meeting and fought back tears as the girls sang father’s day songs to me, while I sneakily (and perhaps a tad inappropriately) recorded them with my camera phone so I could send it to merrill.

I guess I should look at the positive, I was able to be there and record it.

nevertheless, it sucks that he is gone SO MUCH.

in other news, there will be some re-doing going on here, starting today.

meet the main bathroom:

this bathroom bugged me the second I saw it.

just what bugged me?

- the size

- that shelf thing behind the toilet

- the lack of storage

- the lack of light

- the lack of space

- the fact that the light IS NOT CENTERED OVER THE SINK.

(seriously, can’t plumbers and electricians just work together?)

- and it’s small.

(or did I mention that already?)

the main bathroom at the old house was spacious.  there was a lot of counter space, tons (TONS!!!! I tell you) of storage.  there was all of the space in that roomy vanity not to mention a FULL CLOSET.  everything had a home.  I was severely comfortable with that bathroom.

I mean, okay, it did have it’s faults..

the floor, no shower, the tile in the bathtub area, the floor..  but the size was awesome!  and all those other things could be fixed.

here, the size thing is not fixable.

we have also had our dear towels since I bought them when I was a senior in high school.  I loved them so much, had to have them for my future house, and they stayed packed away for two years..  I still do love them, well, the parts that aren’t dingy, stained, or fraying. 

the ducks have been with us since we bought our first house.  they were a gift from my mother-in-law, and we have loved them, but sadly, the whiteness of the towels isn’t what it used to be, and even sadder, the girls really aren’t into rubber ducks like they used to be (something about getting older I suppose).

the plan is to lighten, brighten, and simplify.

so, here’s the battle plan:

- remove that dang shelf

- paint the ceiling white

- replace baseboard with foamboard that will resist (RESIST!!!) water.  (unlike the MDF that is there and soaking up water like a sponge..)

- frame out the plain old contractor mirror with the same foamboard trim.

- add our new paint color to the walls

- board and batten the east wall

(I am more than a little excited about this part.)

- new shower curtain (buh-bye duckies!!)

- replace all towel bars with hooks

- all linens will be replaced with white which will mean that we will not have as many, which will also help on that whole “lack of storage” issue that exists.

I have started the day off right with a banana and a scotcheroo for breakfast, so I am more than ready to go.

(breakfast of champions I tell you.)