style.

ashley has always had some pretty awesome style.

loved coming across this old pic of her from fall of 2008.  she was almost 4.  this is such a fun age!

(still looking at those hello kitty knock-off crocks, trying to figure out if they are on the wrong feet, because the usually were..)

the other most awesome thing about this layout is the stitching.  I LOVE lives stitchies series.  hello, I do have ALL of them, and they are usually a staple on just about every page…

I sent her a special request to create some in whites, black, brown, and especially jute.

she totally delivered!!

(LOVE YOU LIV!!!)

(click on the layout for full list of the goodies of liv’s I used.)

thanks for all your well wishes for the sick man of the house..  still waiting for things to get back to “normal”.

to top it off, I spent the day with lynn at snowbasin.  her first time and she ROCKED IT!!

(but it has been 4 years since I have gone snowbaording..  I am a little sore today.)

(I love advil.)

oh, and I just got the cute little girl in the above layout from school.  seems we might have strep in our home to go along with everything else. :/

quite the weekend.

this last weekend, was one to never forget.

ashley turned 8.

she was baptized the day after her birthday.

(thanks dad for taking this picture!!)

it was a good day.  2 soccer games (at the same time no less), conference, and ash was baptized between sessions.

we like to keep it simple in our family, simple program, short and sweet, nothing too crazy. 

merrill baptized and confirmed her, he did wonderfully.  it was fun to watch them in the hall before, practicing the hold and dunk move.  this time, I made sure to remember the controls to the electric blanket to help warm her afterward.  (I forgot them with lynn, she froze!!)  I love how simple ashley is, she has a different personality than lynn, and her taste is more simple.  her hair wasn’t a big deal, neither was her dress.  love this girl.

I did find it interesting when merrill confirmed her, that she was blessed, again, with integrity.  the same thing was said when she was blessed as a baby.  I found it interesting then too. 

it has been fun watching her grow up and come to this point.  she’s quite a girl!

and I marked one year (ONE YEAR!!) of no yelling (out of anger) at my girls.

(soccer is another matter.  that qualifies as excitement, not anger.)

more on that later.

ashley’s special shoot.

when lynn was preparing to be baptized, we started a couple of traditions.  one was to go out, just me and that almost 8 year-old girl, and buy a special dress. the other was for me to take out the special girl, just she and i, and going to a location of her choice, take some special pictures in that special white dress.

ashley chose the salt lake temple. 

so we made dinner that night (fresh halibut from merrill’s recent trip, that I survived.), and hurried (and by hurried, you have no idea how hurried we were..), to salt lake, trying to get there before the sun set.

we made it.

just in time.

I have to say, I enjoyed that whole drive down and back.  we turned off the music, and talked and talked.  we talked about her upcoming baptism, and what it means.  it was so special to me, to be able to bear my testimony to her, just to her.  we plotted out her whole birthday, from her treat at school, to what she wanted for her birthday dinner, and the cakeS too, of course.  we talked about what she was hoping to unwrap that day,  and she somehow managed to get christmas into that segment of conversation.  I even shared my favorite memories of the day she was born, and more of her when she was younger.

I didn’t want to go back home.  it was such a fun evening.

treasure found.

while cleaning the c drive the other day, I found one file folder that read “mom’s”.

that was vague and mysterious enough to have me wonder what it was, and instead of deleting it immediately (pffft.  like I would do that..) I played it.

I am not going to lie when I tell you it brought tears to my eyes.

I forgot this even existed.

it is only a few seconds, but they are wonderful seconds.

ashley’s birthday

it was october 5th, 2004.  ashley made her way into this world via emergency c-section.

my plan for how that day was supposed to go, was completely thrown out the window.

as I look back on that day, I remember how wonderful it was, but realize how terrifying it must have been for merrill.  I have nothing but wonderful memories.  sure, I was nervous.  but it was one of the four most wonderful days of my life.

those days are in the past, the seconds have ticked by way too fast.

eight years later…

and here we are!

happy birthday my little ashley.

for the record:

- you LOVE anything and everything coconut.

- you are not “short”, you are “fun-sized”.

- you love soccer.

- despite your energy level and active little body, you are not exhausted at the end of the day.  you are a night owl.  (one more item to add to the short list of traits you inherited from me.)

- you want tacos for your birthday dinner tonight.  my bet is that you eat the leftover tomatoes.

- you are so excited to be baptized!

- I can’t tell you what your favorite color is.  I am not sure, it seems to change weekly now.  just a couple of weeks ago, it was orange.  you wanted your whole room orange!  then it was fuchsia, then blue, and now, well as of yesterday anyway, it is maroon.

- you have suddenly turned into a neat freak.  your room hasn’t been messy for 2 weeks now!

- you are so thoughtful.  you asked for a coconut cake for your birthday, but realizing that lynn and dad don’t care for coconut, you asked if I could make a chocolate cake too.

we are so happy to have you as our favorite middle child!

ash

this kid was far more mellow about the whole “take my picture so I can get some pop rocks” bit.

I had to remind her that I wanted to take her pictures…

the mellowness ended as soon as she was in front of the camera, and I was behind it.  it took a good ten minutes to get the sillies out.

(those might have to come out in a blooper reel one day..)

her “big person” teeth are making their first appearance, I am relishing the few days we have left to enjoy her darling gummy-ness.

and I just love this one a bit much. I feel kinda guilty because of how much I love it.

and this little pose, was totally her idea.  I think she’s been peeking at my bride+groom wedding board on pinterest…

so as her first grade year ends, I am so happy for how happy she was throughout the year.  I am thankful for the friends she has made, and for how far she has come in so many areas!

I am looking forward to a fun and very silly summer with her around.

not looking so much to all that second grade entails, you know, the goofy “big people” teeth, the homework (ugh!!), and the growing up even more without my consent.

little soccer player.

and please, when you read “soccer”, don’t read “sock-her”.  read it like adam sandler would say it: “sock-a playa”.  that’s just how we say it around here.

we (totally meaning “I”) also yell (but not in anger), to pump her crazy legs, and when she starts to get to polite on the field, I yell her name (but again, not in anger, it has been 7 months, almost 8 now!!) and make a fist and growl at her.  I want her to play for heaven’s sake!!  not apologize for stealing the ball and then practically giving it back!

she has had a love/hate relationship with soccer (again, please watch your pronunciation!).  any given day she would be in love, absolute love I tell you, with soccer.  the next, she would hate it.

today, and she has been holding steady for a week now (amazing!!), that she loves it.

I signed her up for another year, and in all the excitement/convincing peyton became sold on the idea as well.  come fall, we will have two little “socca-playas”.

this weekend, ash had her last game.  the kid was responsible for shooting a few goals, and making one.  she had a few awesome blocks, but none as awesome as the header she took a few weeks ago.  that was fun!

I didn’t get pictures of her last game, and with her wearing her most awesome participation medal (that I have been commissioned to make a shelf for, as well as all soon to follow medals and trophies…), but looking through last week’s pictures, I found some evidence that she is mine..  you know, despite that fact that she pretty much looks just like her dad and all.

 

my dad used to tease me when I would play basketball.  I mean, he teased me a lot, not just when I played basketball, but when I would play basketball, and maybe miss a shot, he would tell me that I wasn’t “holding my tongue right”.

apparently ash has inherited this from me.

isn’t she cute?

“babe”raham lincoln.

so lynnie-lou-hoo had a biography study that we worked on for the better part of february.  they cold choose pretty much anyone, and lynn chose abraham lincoln.

I was a little surprised to say the least.

she went with it though, and enjoyed it, for the most part.  there was a bit of drama during the process, she was really worried about her speech.  but she did great.

last night there was a wax museum for all the third graders.  grandmas came, they brought cousins and even great-aunt doreen came.  it was nice to have such a great show of support for lynn.

(and she was so happy when the night was over!)

ashley had to get in on the action too.

the kid cracks me up!

gunning for “mother of the year”.

I might just totally get it too.

so we had a little cold floating around our house before thanksgiving.  it went from peyton, to me, to ash, and it was fun!

so when december rolled around, and some of us were still suffering from some cold-like symptoms, still, I thought it was just that, the cold.

then ashley started to complain that her head hurt (here’s where “mother of the year” comes in).  complaints would start rolling in as soon as it was bedtime, and being the night-owl she is, I thought it was all a ruse so she would get to stay up late.  but the complaints stayed consistent, and being the great mother I am, I drugged her up with some good old tylenol.  I thought that perhaps, she wasn’t getting enough hydration, enough sleep?

so this goes on for a week, maybe more.  face it, I am running for “mother of the year”, I really didn’t keep track.

then one night, I start to realize that my head has been hurting too. 

(I was sure it was a result from the complaints and lack of sleep on my end of the deal.)

then my teeth start to hurt.

there was junk in my throat too.

then the pieces (the first ones anyway) fell into place.

I had a sinus infection!

then a light bulb went on in my little noodle; and it sounded like gru from “despicable me”.

“yight bulb.”

ashley had a sinus infection too.

so I took us, and our twin sinus infections to the doctor, to pay twin co-pays, and twin doctor bills soon as well, and got us a couple of prescriptions.

then I went and stocked-up on more drugs, cause that advil congestions relief is awesome.

things got better, kind of.

then ashley got all itchy.

ashley is allergic to penicillin.

so fun!

so our christmas break consisted of her, getting in her three doses of azithromycin, and ensuring that the doctor noted her new allergy on her chart.

I am so thankful thankful that I am able to instant message my doctor!

(and not have a new co-pay to pay…)

see, “mother of the year” material here.

the day dictionary.com helped me be a good mom.

so we’ll just say that there has a lot been going on around these parts.  sure, sure, you have most likely been busy too.  whatever.

but there was this one day, roughly two weeks ago (I know cause my antibiotic just ran out..) and ash was home from school after having a bad night, trying to sleep with a sinus headache.

(yeah, I am sure that I am in the running for mother of the year for that story.)

so, being sleep deprived and not feeling too well, she was understandably a bit emotional as well.  she came and snuggled in my lap, and started to tell me how she was sad and didn’t like going to school, that kids were mean to her, one kid in particular.

the situation was one that some might not think too serious, but in our family, there are certain words, language that is not acceptable.  in our home, we try to have an atmosphere of love, and we just don’t say certain things.

so this kid was apparently telling ashley that she was stupid and also an idiot.

(so here’s a tangent for your enjoyment, merrill and I still find occasion to use these words, when they fit, but we don’t say these words, we have changed them just a smidge so the kiddos don’t catch on, and if they do use them, nobody else knows what the crap they are talking about.  stupid = stubbid and idiot = idjuwit.)

I knew that it wouldn’t be enough to simply tell her, “well, you aren’t.”  I sat there, trying to keep my anger in check, my knee-jerk reaction from coming out first, and thought about what my response to her should really be.  we’d had problems with this kid previously, and I was trying to be wise in my approach, not wanting to dredge up past incidences and tell her that basically this kid was just what they were calling her.

then the thought hit me.

use the dictionary.

it’s an approach I’ve taken with lynn recently while doing homework, I make her work out the bulk of it instead giving her all the answers, telling her what or how things are.

(oh, and she loves it!!)

(that was sarcasm by the way.  it has been a while, I was afraid you forgot what my sarcasm sounded like!)

so we went to dictionary.com and looked up each word.  as I read the definitions to each one, I asked her, “are you any of those things?”

“no.”

“then you don’t worry about what anyone else says to you.  you know you are not those things.”

it worked.

and that is the story of how dictionary.com helped me to be a better mom.

oh, and it was also pretty great of me to go and talk to her teacher about the problem.  her teacher is a saint!

I’m dreaming of a toothless Christmas.

here is my sweet ash:

this time last night, she lost her first tooth.

in this pic her cheeks are still slightly tear-stained and her eyes a bit shiny.  she didn’t take to this development very well initially.

I can honestly tell you that my kids can bribe me.  sounds backwards I know.  but if they want something, and they have a loose tooth, they will get what they want just about every time if the words, “and I will let you wiggle my tooth” are attached.

that is how ashley lost her tooth last night.

I cannot recall what it was she wanted.

I just remember that I got to wiggle her little tooth.  then, it got stuck behind her other front tooth and she wanted it “back to normal”.  but that was not what she got.  I got it out of it’s stuck position in every way.  got it out of her mouth.

lynn freaked.

(she doesn’t like blood.)

her freaking freaked merrill.

ashley cried.

she looked at herself and said, “now I look ugly!”

she said she wasn’t going to go to school because, “everyone will look at me.”

we talked about that and decided that it wouldn’t be that bad.  today was a half day, so they would only look at her for half of the day.  by the next full day, it would be old news.

(but I am sure her classmates will still look at her.)

when ash initially told me she had a loose tooth, I assumed it was a bottom guy.  I am still weirded-out by the tooth-falling-out-order situation with this kid.  I mean, she refused to be born the conventional way (not that I am complaining.  I loved the c-section.  but it was pricey!), she is pretty stubborn about most things in life, and now, her teeth are going to fall out all wonky.

(totally kidding.  I am aware that there is no set order for this occurrence.)

I am just accustomed to the bottom middle guys taking the fall first.

the second emotion I felt when she first told me of her loose tooth was sadness.  was she really getting older and reaching another milestone?

I thought I told her to knock this business off…

and her perfect little teeth..

those perfect baby teeth…

(sigh.)

but now, I am loving this gap, and the cute little lisp that accompanies it.

she likes the perfect little nook in which to stick her straw.

she got over her sadness when we started talking about all the pros to this situation, like the straw thing, the tooth fairy, and how she would be queen of the day today.  popsicles also helped.  she picked out her own box at the store and promptly turned her whole mouth green. 

as part of the “queen of the day” arrangement we have here, tonight, she picked dinner: spaghetti and meatballs.  she enjoyed feeding herself spaghetti through her new gap.

I am hoping for the next door fellow (who is also loose) to fall out soon.  would prefer it to fall out before christmas, cause really, it would just be too cute!

back to our regularly scheduled life.

we just got back from a lovely and very fun-filled vacation.

we did disneyland.

it was awesome.

I think everyone who lives in this house, is a little homesick for all things disney.

but I now realize that this transition from vacation to real life is a lot harder than I thought.  it is also made more difficult when I realize that there are a few things that I neglected to do before we left..

like plug the latest product releases from jessica sprague. 

so, let’s rewind, pretend that it is last monday, and instead of getting ready to surprise the kiddos, pack all of their stuff, clean the house and all that junk, I will do what I am supposed to, and show you what I made:

first up I will show off jodie lee’s latest water color paper..

I saw this dreamy stuff and was transported to last fall, when we hiked the “u” near our house.  the colors were too perfect.

(click on layout for full credits.)

I have been dreaming up some hybrid projects to use this stuff on, print it off on linen look paper..  it would be lovely, I am sure.

then there was the big one.

I based ashley’s birthday party around this next one.

splendid fiins “trick or treat” practically yelled my name, winked, and then grinned at me.  it knew it fit the bill for our halloween themed birthday party.

invites:

(click on image for full list of credits.)

a little lesson learned, that I will share with you for free:

don’t put names (even though it is so fun, personal, not to mention stinking cute) on a first grader’s birthday invites.  you are better off to leave those babies blank, that way, your child doesn’t distribute them a child with a different name and thus, have a buttload of confusion on your hands when parents are calling you and asking if their child was really invited because their invite doesn’t have their name on it.  oh, an then you get to make more, because a few kiddos don’t get their invites due to the whole, “not give them to the right kid” issue.

we had a great time though..

we put together goodie bags with fun stuff from target’s dollar area, candy was a necessary addition, and I put together these little notebooks using splendid fiin’s “trick or treat” line.

they were pretty darn cute.

I added these little tags for ashley to sign, a little thank you to all her friends.

(splendid fiins again, and I used the font mtf “jotted”.)

In the way of decorations, I used my old felt ghosts..

some balloons (which all the right colors were sold out, should have anticipated that one..), and this banner that I threw together the day of.

(polka-dot paper from splendid fiins, some good old cardstock, ric-rack, and letters I cut out with my cricut + storybook cartridge.)

I employed the old dry ice + rootbeer in the plastic cauldron trick.

played “pin the eyebrow on frank”, ashley’s new boyfriend.  we made him out of foamcore, and vinyl.  his eyebrow was some black felt with double stick tape on the back.

this game was also a last minute add, but I saw it on a local tv program, and had to do it!

I took three kiddos inside, and wrapped them up with crepe paper, just like a mummy.  as I wrapped, I hid three cards with one letter on them, in different places in the wrapping.  as their teams unwrapped them, the found the cards, and the first team to spell their spooky word, won!

I used words like bat, boo, and cat.

(I got the idea from this fun mom blogger who has a ton of fun ideas.)

and what’s a party with out cake and ice cream?

I prepared cupcakes and frosting a head of time, portioned out the frosting in little disposable cups with a plastic knife, and put out candies for them to decorate with.

I found a genius idea for ice cream serving at a birthday party on pinterest, and I will be using that one again and again I tell you.

before your party, like an hour, you take your regular old cupcake liners, place them in your muffin tin, and scoop your ice cream into them.  pop the tin, with the portions of ice cream in it, back in your freezer and when it’s cake + ice cream time, bring them out, and give one portion to each child.  it was a breeze!

ash had a great party, and I must confess, it is the first birthday party I have ever thrown.  I will do it again.  it was so much fun, but next time, I might just request no gifts be brought.  I know, I am so mean, but we are seriously overrun here.

and they keep growing up.

ashley turned 7 today.

I know.

I thought I had made a deal with these kids.

a deal that entailed their not growing up anymore, and I would keep up on the laundry, cleaning, feeding them and whatnot.

they totally aren’t living up to their end.

ashley is in a current phase.

a phase which includes these questions, daily.

1) what is your favorite color?

2) what is your favorite dinosaur?

3) what is your favorite princess?

I can tell you all of her favorites today.

1) brown

2) mammoth or allosauarus (it’s a tie)

and

3) mulan

so at first this birthday was going to revolve all around our extinct friends until, while rummaging around for the jurassic park dvd, she came across mulan, and, well, the rest is history.

let me tell you how hard it is to find anything mulan.

nevermind.  I am still tired from finding the few mulan things I did to tell you how tiring it is.

I have never been more thankful for amazon prime (free 2 day shipping!!), or rather the fact that I forgot to cancel it after my trial period (ordering easter goodies that I couldn’t find locally).

her birthday presents (well, at least the bulk) arrived today.

(see, SO thankful for 2 day shipping.)

but look at how happy she is:

think she might be even happier when she gets her dress-up.. 

(shh!!!  don’t tell her!!!)

she also asked for a mulan cake.

I will say that I did my best, but this weather, and a time crunch today left me less than pleased with how she turned out.

(my dad would reassure me that it looks fine, and that it will just turn into poop anyway..)

I think she turned out looking more hispanic, maybe even polynesian.

I will blame it on:

a) the time issue

and b) the weather.  my hands are killing me with this new cold air and all the rain.

and now that I have read through this post a couple of times, I sound not so chipper.

I guess that is why I usually compose happy birthday posts (heavy on the happy) a day or so in advance and plug in pictures the day of?

not so tired then, are we?

so here goes 7 happy things about my 7 year old girl:

1) you have quick wit.  I mean seriously, where do you get that from?  one thing can be said, and there’s ashley, following through with a zinger to tack on the end.

2) you can’t seem to go to the bathroom with the shower curtain open.  you also can’t seem to spend less than 15 minutes in there either.  I think that is hysterical!

3) you cannot go to sleep unless I have tucked you in.  sometimes you need to take one of your famous (aforementioned) trips to the bathroom, after the initial tucking-in, and you cannot settle down unless I re-tuck.

4) you make up songs in the shower.  then you sing them repeatedly and get them stuck in my head.

5) you eat anything and everything!!  well, except for school lunch, and well, I can’t blame you there.

6) you read like it is the easiest thing in the world.  homework this year is a breeze!  and you love to read.

7) everyone (including the random kids we meet at random places like mcdonald’s in page) are your new “best friends” and everyone in our neighborhood/ward/grade/school, are also on that “best friends” list.

happy birthday sweet ashley. xox

Say it isn’t so…

Summer, over, really?

I don’t like the idea of this.

So I am going to proclaim that it isn’t over, nope, not really.  Not yet.

We still have stuff we want to do.  So much more fun to be had!

So what if they are “in school”.  I will just pretend that it is just a practice run until our summer fun is really over and done.  (Well, more like when the weather doesn’t shout summer at us anymore.)

Sunday night, we slept out on the trampoline, you know, one last “hoo-rah” before bedtime becomes nazi-ish again. 

(And when I say “we”, I really mean just me and the girls.)

We attempted this in July, the night of the 5th (really our 4th what with the real fourth being on Sunday and all..) but a little rainstorm somewhere around 3 in the am cut out night out on the trampoline short.

This time, I was going to have all our bases covered.

- good weather (check)

- mosquito repellant (check)

- plenty of cushiness (check, check, check, check)

- sprinklers off (check)

Or so I thought on that last one.

4:30 am I hear the combined gush of air and water and then one drop, that was all it took, right on my forehead.  I was up faster than I have been in a long time, running back into the house, out to the garage, and turned that water off!!

It was pleasant sleeping after that.

Well, until that period of time, right before dawn, when I would swear to you it gets its coldest.  I wasn’t sleeping too well then.  I wished I’d had my socks on then.  So instead, I curled up in a little ball, snuggled close to Peyton’s warm little body and fleece blanket, and all was better.

Yesterday evening was back to school night.  We knew exactly what we were going to get with Ash’s teacher, and we were ALL very excited about that.  Lynn was a little nervous about her teachers.  There was a last minute switch to her teaching line-up that left my already nervous daughter that much more.  I think some of her fears were put to rest after meeting them.

We came home and had family home evening.  We talked about prayer, that the girls can always go to their Heavenly Father in prayer, whenever they need help.  Even if it is while they are sitting at their desk and need help.  We also talked about the priesthood, how it blesses our lives.  Merrill then gave them each a father’s blessing to start their year off right.

Peyton was so excited, she even got one too.

That is a tradition I cherish.

Then there was last night.

Sleeping (or trying to).

In our own beds.

At a nazi-ish time.

I don’t know who slept worse..  me or them. 

Third grader..  times-tables and cursive?  Really?!  Good heavens, I had to buy her a flash drive as part of her school supplies.

And then there’s the first grader.

I will miss her terribly come 11:30.  She will have lunch, at school.

It is a happy time of life.  It really is all good…

But it sucks that summer is over.

a special moment with my "most special-est" middle child.

today was a fun day.
i had only two children for the bulk of the day instead of my usual three.
so it was just me, the youngest, and the middle.
during our day, ashley asked rather thoughtfully, "mom, is it true that the middle child is the most special-est?"
suppressing a laugh, i answered her in the affirmitive.
"you bet."
there was a little chorus of "yes-es" and fist-pumping from the middle seat (perfect for that  middle child, wouldn't you say?) at my response.
"i knew i was the most special-est!!!"
after a while, she came to me, rather somber again, and asked, "mom, even though i am your most special-est child, because i am the middle child, you still love us all equally, don't you?"
i had to answer yes again.
such a sweetie.  glad she is embracing her middle child role.

Another milestone for the middle child.

Our little Ashley graduated from kindergarten.

It’s quite bittersweet.

She is learning so much, so fast.  It is fun to see, but sad that the innocence of life is slowly fading away.

She will be gone all day next year.  I’m not sure who will miss her more, me or Peyton.

She is just plain growing up.

That kinda sucks.

But isn’t she cute?

Even with her dress on backwards, she was a doll.

more ashley.

so ashley’s hand is “better”.  it is a great camouflage of bruise, not so puffy, and not broken.  (yay!!)  she can make a beautiful fist, wiggle each finger independently, and use it like she did before (but hopefully not as the meat in a bowling ball sandwich again).

i am very guarded with her still, worry a little more than i normally would when it gets bumped or knocked (or even hit, because peyton figured out that that is ashley’s weak spot now).

so last night, ashley fell off the kitchen chair in some sort of balance, gymnast maneuver, and started to cry. 

the freak-out mother took over, asking quite frantically what happened, repeatedly, think “machine-gun” speed.

ashley just looked up at me, crocodile tears brimming in her eyes, and a little sob escaped her.

“mmmmm-mom..  (sob)  iii-i-i huuu-(sooooob)urrtttt mmmmm-yyyyyyy (sob)(sniff) i hurt my…  A-S-S.”

yup.

she spelled it.

leave it to my middle child.

i am so thankful she didn’t say it.  peyton was right there!

A Series of Unfortunate Circumstances.

I had a fantastic Mother’s Day yesterday.
I didn’t know that one mom could get so many cards!!  I have to have the sweetest three girls ever..  oh, and the “Ninja” that Merrill “got” for me.  (Or that I got for myself and told him that it was from him.  Thanks Merrill!!  Aren’t the smoothies and daiquiris yummy?)  See, great guy too!
We spent the morning much like any other Sunday morning, taking our time getting ready, herding girls to get their hair fixed, packing the church bag, counting fruit snacks..  practicing to sing in sacrament meeting..  you know, the “usual”.  Yes, the usual indeed, peppered with cards and a few more hugs, kisses, and “I love yous” than usual. 
After church, we had a family get together for mother’s day.  It was originally to be held at my brother-in-law’s house, but due to rain, was moved to my mother and father-in-law’s house. 
(First and second unfortunate circumstances.)
The plan was to eat, and visit for just a bit, so we could make it to my mom and dad’s house, and get the kiddos home in time for a bedtime that wouldn’t be offensive to our Monday.
We arrived to find that the grill wasn’t getting hot enough to cook the food to a consumable point, so dinner was a little later than initially planned.
(Third unfortunate circumstance.)
The food was finally ready, and people began eating in stages.  We started with small children, they are the most vocal about eating, and moved forward.  By the time the adults were eating, the kids were done and off playing.
During the clean-up process, just as we were readying ourselves to leave, a cry came up from the basement.  It was attached to Peyton.  Being offended, somehow, and not having had her Sunday nap, she was tired and I was trying to console her.  Then a second cry started in the basement.  It was Ashley.
It wasn’t good either. 
It was a cry with a reason behind it.
While trying to befriend a bowling ball, save it from getting knocked around at the opening of the ball return by another arriving bowling ball, that other ball came to make her hand the meat in their bowling ball sandwich.  Little Ashley’s hand didn’t look so good.

(Okay, so the pictures suck..  they were with my phone.  Yes, suck indeed.  Just imagine a skin bubble filled with a quarter cup of blood on the back of her hand, okay?)
The whole back side was puffy, half of it a bubble of tender skin.  Ice was applied and we took off.
Merrill and the girls went home and Ash and I went to the E.R. 
She was afraid.  Her fears were expressed as I was putting ice on it at grandpa and grandma’s.
“I don’t want to die!!!”
She really didn’t want to go to the hospital, and she told me why today.
“I thought they were going to cut my hand open with scissors.”  That little explanation was followed by a shudder.  Albeit a cute shudder.
On the short drive to the hospital, I called my mom to wish her a happy mother’s day, and to tell her why she wouldn’t see us that day, give her a big, fat I.O.U. and to tell her I loved her.  I think that in that moment, prayers were sent up from all around.
I know there was a non-stop prayer in my heart, silently uttered in my mind, repeatedly.  Lynn told me that when they got inside the house, they prayed, Peyton told me that she said a prayer too.  I have no doubt, that there were many prayers offered on behalf of my little girl. 
We said a prayer too, right before we went into the emergency room.  And I mean, talk about flashbacks!!  That was where we entered the hospital the morning we had her.  Right above the entrance was where the helicopter landing pad is, right below where our room was while I recovered after she was born.  Just another day for this mom.  That hospital holds so many memories..
She was more calm as she saw just how many kind people were there to help her. 
I can tell you that I was asked seven times (no exaggeration) if I was her mother.  Seven times by seven different people.  I was tempted to show the last couple of those askers my c-section scar to prove it. 
 
(She cheered-up pretty quickly.)
We played “I spy” to kill time (she loved that turn-of-phrase), and I told her all the stories I could think of that were hospital related. 
The doctor there was a good guy.  He talked about all things “Tangled” to her while he took care of her.  His initial assessment was a broken blood vessel, what with the bubble on the back of her hand..  but ordered X-rays to be sure.  As he left the room that first time, he asked her if she had any questions for him.  She just shook her head.  He said, “Not even about what I like to do when I don’t have to work?  How rude!”  That got a giggle.
Then the radiologist came, asked Ashley a few questions, asked me if I was her mother, and asked if we were really bowling at grandpa and grandma’s.  (“Who has a bowling alley in their house?!”)  Then she asked if Ashley wanted a ride down to the radiology room.  I think that was her favorite part of the whole visit, being wheeled around in that wheel chair.
(I must also note that I was trying to not be the over-excited mom, taking pictures of the whole process..  but my, but she was so darn cute in that chair!!)
I am not a radiologist by any means (but I have seen a few X-rays in my time…  thank you Peyton.), but hers looked normal to me.  I was hopeful…
They looked “normal” to our doctor as well, but he was still concerned about her mobility.  She couldn’t manipulate her hand in some of the ways that she needed to, the swelling was an factor in that, sure, but he was concerned about her age and the development of her bones, things he might not be able to see that second.
He decided to splint her, immobilize the hand so the bleeding would stop, and if there were any breaks they could begin to set.
As he started fitting her with her splint, she asked him, “Does a force field come with this?”  Totally caught him off guard and their silly exchange only continued.  He was a nice guy.
So at the end of our day, as we were finally leaving that place, Ashley tells me, “It was the worst and the best Mother’s Day ever.”
“How was it the worst?”
(Like I didn’t know.)
“Well, I hurt my hand.”
“How was it the best?”
“I got to spend lots of time with just me and you.”
So as I look back, sure, it was a series of unfortunate circumstances (much like in “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”.  LOVE that movie…) and if one thing had been different, maybe this wouldn’t have happened to our little Ash.  You know, the bowling ball sandwich stuff and the following events.
Had it not been raining, we would have been outside, at a different house, one that doesn’t have a bowling lane in the basement with an over-excited ball return.
Had the grill been hot enough, maybe we all would have been eating together.
Had we all eaten together, maybe they wouldn’t have run off to play, or needed to go by the exciting bowling lane and over-excited ball return.
If we had been able to eat earlier, maybe we would have been gone, to the other grandma’s house.
If any one of those things had been different, maybe, just maybe, Ashley’s little hand wouldn’t have been there trying to move a bowling ball.
See, what if.  Maybe.
But if things had gone that way, then Mother’s Day 2011 would have been just another Mother’s Day.  It wouldn’t have been the best and the worst and Ash and I wouldn’t have been able to spend time as just us.

Whereabouts and such.

I could easily throw myself into typing a rather lengthy list of reasons why nothing seems to be going on here (perhaps that would answer some of the almost panicked e-mails that have been arriving in my inbox these last few days?) but that would be sufficiently boring, I am sure.

I can tell you that the headaches I seem to have are not friendly to a computer screen.  Not really friendly to much to be quite honest.

Then there are projects that I have been working on, that are very friendly to my headaches.  Projects that require not much thinking at all, repetitive actions, and lots of holding still, or being semi-still. 

There are also possible reasons/causes for these awesome headaches..  just a few theories: 

- allergies

- sinus issues (due to the above)

- sleep deficiencies

- children (reason for sleep deficiencies)

- old age (?)

- too much sugar

So following one of the possible theories, I, in a rash decision (according to Merrill), vacated my craft room to turn it into a bedroom for Ashley.  If you, or he, were here to experience what  a non-peaceful event bedtime was, you would have done the same thing.

Ashley and Peyton are not good roommates.

Well, that actually depends on who you ask.  They would say that they make fantastic roommates, I would have to disagree.  You see, Ashley has encouraged, cheered-on her younger sibling to ascend the ladder to the top bunk to “hang out” and “talk”.  I took that ladder away.  I took it far, far away, and then what does the older, influential sister do?  Why teach her younger sister how to scale the bed frame, using the windowsill, whereby to gain access to that upper bunk.  The look of triumph on that littlest girl’s face was magical.  The look on mine was pure annoyance, a sheer second of shared excitement, but mostly annoyance.

(Fantastic roommates!  If no one needed to sleep.)

Bedtime commences around here at 8:30.  They would usually fall asleep somewhere after the final beating, or to people who go by actual “time”, roughly 10:30 pm.  Sometimes later, after more beatings, and various threats.

Bedtime for me, took on an entirely different name.

Thus, the move.

Justified?

Totally.

Ashley does love her new room, I have somewhat enjoyed putting it together.  I only wish that the weather would cooperate so I could finish painting a shelf to help rid the floor of it’s newly inherited mess.

Bedtime, is back to being bedtime in my book.

(Success!)

Meanwhile, I am homeless.

My stuff, the whole lot of it, sits in one of the unfinished rooms in the basement, waiting for me to feel inspired as to what to do with it.

Merrill seems to think that I should take the large room in the basement.

(Well, that is only after the thought that I was too “rash” and should not have given up my room in the first place, but remember, *he was not present for the hellish routine of bedtime on the most hellish of nights*.  “Rash”, I think not, I have been pondering the move for quite some time now.)

Now back to that room in the basement.  It is a very nice, large space, with sucky morgue-ish lighting.  It also has a wall color on one one (thank heavens) that resembles a place where bright orange outdoor basketballs have been massacred.

Can I be creative in a poorly-lit basketball murder scene?

(Quite a coincidence how the two of those details go hand in hand..)

No, I can not!

I need a color that inspires, lighting that makes me feel alive!

So maybe, once I feel better, I will want to paint, and move on in…

Meanwhile, I am homeless.

Oh, and I have a headache now.

The happiest puke-face in the world.

I got my due punishment for taking Ashley to lunch at McDonald’s (or as I have so appropriately re-named them “Yak-Donald’s”) yesterday.  You see, there were basically no groceries in our little house.  I fully intended on procuring some while Ashley was at kindergarten (because only one child makes that errand MUCH more enjoyable), but instead, got caught up at Costco, two fabric stores and one thrift store.  Oh, and a book store.  No groceries were purchased (other treasures were), unless you can count the three bricks of Tillamook colby jack I bought at Costco a meal.

So we picked up Ashley at school, and went to that “one place” for lunch.

(It helps to go shopping with a full stomach.  I know, I have had experience shopping with an empty one.  I almost bought a cake at Sam’s club because I skipped lunch one time.)

We had a great lunch, and even greater lunch conversation.

“Mom, I have to tell you something, and I don’t know how I am going to tell you this…”

“Just tell me.”

“But it is something serious and I am not sure how you are going to take it.”

“How about telling me, and seeing how I take it.”

“Okay….”

(Deep breath followed by a sigh.”

“You know that kid from PBS kids, Calliou?”

“Um, yeah.”

(I am thinking about that annoying kid.  The show I dislike SO much because he is ALWAYS whining about something…  why did I ever buy that DVD?!?)

“Well mom, he’s bald.”

I’m laughing.

“Seriously mom.  He has NO HAIR.”

“Well (more laughing) that is usually how one looks when they are bald.”

Holy crack me up.

Then, while shopping, she brought up an un-finished conversation that started during sacrament meeting. 

“Mom, does your middle finger really mean a bad word?”

(See why it was left unfinished during sacrament meeting?  I seriously prayed that she would forget entirely about it.  That seemed like an appropriate thing to do during sacrament meeting, pray, I mean.)

“Yes.”

“What bad word is it?”

“I will not say it.”

“Why not?!  Tell me!!”

“No.  It is the worst word ever.  The finger is an obscene gesture, it is basically telling someone: ‘Forget You”, and that just isn’t nice, we don’t want to forget people.”

“So we shouldn’t show people our middle finger?”

“No.”

Later on, she got a paper cut.  The only reason why I knew was because she was trying to swing (in the nanosecond of actual spring weather we had yesterday..) with a Kleenex wrapped around her middle finger.

I asked if she wanted me to put a band aid on it.

“Yes.  I am tired of holding my bad word finger.”

See, funny.

But now I get to the follow-up to our little trip to “Yak-Donald’s”…

I get her up to get ready this morning.  She doesn’t feel good and proceeds to throw up.  (I am blaming “Yak-Donald’s only because the food is gross and the place is a breeding grounds for all sorts of communicable diseases.) 

But get this:

She is the happiest, cutest, sweetest puker in the whole world.

(Of this I am completely sure.)

“I love you mommy.”  she said after I wiped her face.

“Thank you mommy, I love you.”  she said in between heaves while I held her hair out of her face while it was in the toilet.

“I love you mommy.”  she said again while I pulled it into a ponytail while she threw-up in the barf bowl.

And after every session of heaving, there would be a little, weak smile on her sweet face.  I wouldn’t be smiling if I were barfing the day away.  I could learn something from this kid.

Later on, after a bubble bath in my tub, she thanked me again.

“I love you mom.  I am sorry for giving you attitude and not being nice or making good choices, and you love me anyway.”

That is my job.  To love her and take care of her no matter what, and sometimes she gets it.

She really is the sweetest, happiest, cutest puke-face ever.  I am glad she is done puking though.

Twinners.

Ashley has been planning for DAYS, what we would wear for our day together on Wednesday.  We have shirts that are similar, and she has wanted us to be twins.

I go to school with Ashley every Wednesday, committed to it at the beginning of the year in hopes that her teacher would get to know me, and that this year of kindergarten would go better than the other year of kindergarten we experienced.

That, and I have always dreamed of being able to help in my kids’ classrooms.  In the past couple of years, it just wasn’t going to happen.  A nursing baby, preschool schedule, etc.  This year was it.  I have to admit, that at the beginning of the year, I was already dreading EVERY Wednesday.  It is one thing to have the two of them ready in time to get to school, it is a whole other thing to have all of us ready.

I have been blessed with my dear mom who has come just about every week to play with Peyton for the two hours that I spend with Ash.  I have also been blessed with a good friend who has always been willing to help as well.

(Thank you!!!)

It has been a good thing for Ashley and me.

So when Ashley had another sleepless night, plagued with coughing and breathing issues, both of which kept her from going to school yesterday, I totally didn’t expect her to want to be my twin for the day.

She still wanted it, and I totally embraced it.  She even wanted twin hair.

(Minus the curls.  She hates it when I curl her hair.  A “flip” sufficed.)

How much longer will she even want to be like this?  Want to look just like her mom?

(And WILLINGLY take pictures with me?  It did help that I let her control the remote…)

So I ate it up.

And she was silly as usual..

It was fun going to the doctor and being twins there.