I promise I am laughing hysterically inside..

And outwardly at moments too.
Last night, we had our own little horrific moment at the Pitcher household..
It was after family prayers.
Peyton has still had a touchy little tummy, and yesterday, after two diapers that resembled something more like dirty water rather than the regular, stinky poo, I had to warn Merrill that swinging her, upside down, might not be the best idea.
"But look at her!! She is loving it. She doesn't seem sick.."
"She throws-up, YOU clean it up."
My simple warning went unheeded.
I was in the hallway, right outside the girls bedroom door, giving Ashley a breathing treatment (yes, it is that time of the year..) and Merrill was in the doorway, swinging the time bomb.
All in less than a minute, there she blew... just like a swinging fountain.
With each swing, she covered a different quadrant of the immediate area.
IT GOT ALL OVER.
All over Ashley.
All over Merrill (he totally deserved it). I got to take the newly cleaned pants BACK to the cleaner today..
All over the floor, both carpeted and hardwood.
All over.
Ashley began crying, "She got me!!" like she had just been shot in a drive-by.
Poor Peyton kept gagging, back on her two feet, on solid ground. She gave a little shudder because some had gone up her nose, she was upside-down after all.. poor thing.
I was having a little pity party, because the newly cleaned floor, and barely bathed children, needed another cleansing.
And guess who got to do the cleansing.
The third child in my brood began to wail as well, as soon as I reached for the nearest absorbent object, Lynn's pink hooded bath towel.
"MY PINK TOWEL!!! Not my pink towel.. oh no!! I can NEVER use it again.. IT'S RUINED!!" Sob, sob, soooobbbb!
It was quite dramatic.
The two youngest were re-bathed, and the older of the two, sent to bed. I went up to the loft with poor little Pey, her sippy cup full of ginger ale, ready to cuddle and recover from this traumatic experience.
Only to re-live it two more times, but not quite as bad.
With another bath, and a priesthood blessing (I am SO thankful for that!), she was finally able to find rest, until midnight when she woke up.
She was restless, and I snuggled her back to sleep, fearful that she would wake up for round three, she and I stayed up in the loft for the rest of the night.
Three am came with a still restless Peyton waking up and crying for a drink. I put it off, not wanting to upset the gods of vomit, but gave in. She quickly chugged more than half of the cup, and was back to sleep.
As I lay, not quite sleeping, but very tired, I ran through the events of this last week, trying to add it all up. I realized that she hasn't had very many wet diapers the last few days, and her eyes weren't looking very good either. Fearing but trying to have faith in the blessing Merrill gave her, I settled on taking her to the doctors if she had another horrific diaper today.
She did.
But thankfully mom was the babysitter, and she got to deal with that. :)
I got to deal with the laundry. :(
The doctor noticed my eyes first, they are more red than white these days, Visine is my best friend, and he questioned (and teased) me about that, then we got to the main issue.
Let me take a little tangent and tell you how the nurses seemed to be so haunted by the events across the way at the InstaCare..
Swine Flu is upon us.
Scary.
Basically, he believes she has a virus, and isn't worried about her being dehydrated, showed me other signs to look for, and sent us on our way.
I sure hope this ends soon.
I think I am starting to smell like vomit.
I just might throw up myself if I think too much about how much our little field trip cost us today...