Wednesday, March 21, 2012

this cold/allergies/cold/flu/plague/cold i have is not allowing me to sleep, or maybe it is the residual guilt i feel from my mother's chastising phone call?

it is true, the delirium is driving me to compose record-breaking post titles.

so here's the craps on the haps:

last weekish, i started to feel a little sore throat coming on.  it made it rather difficult to sleep.  i decided i was getting a cold and then the next day, it was gone.  the the sneezing/runny nose phase set in, so i decided well, what with the crazy utah weather we have going on, warmth, blooming, wind, it could really just be allergies.  but the same night the sore throat decided to come back, with glory.  i had merrill and his healthy self go and procure me some nyquil (so i could get some zzzs).
that is when hell made an appearance, not that i can recall, cause nyquil messes me up, but the next two days were pretty awful.

i have learned that i cannot take nyquil if i am needed, at a functioning state, before 2 pm.  seriously.  not even if i take it with dinner..  it messes me up kids.

that was when i decided that this was no cold, it was "the plauge".

the girls were home from school on friday, that was one of the days i was not functioning properly, but my best friend forever, called and told me to send my children to her house for lunch and to be around someone who is capable of being a mother-type figure instead of a blob on the couch who is under the influence of nyquil.

(okay, so she didn't say all of that.)

she did feed them and even entertained them for a while.

i decided friday night, that there would be no more nyquil in my future.  "the sauce" was not good for me.

saturday looked much better, still not feeling 100%, but i was functioning by 11 am. (!!!!!)

i was determined to go to church the next day.

merrill was starting his downward slide though.

oops.  i had been so careful!   no kissing, no sharing drinks or food.  washing hands and junk.  (do you know what it is like to have a sick husband?  yeah?  so you can understand that i was super careful.)

sunday morning (very early) he resorted to the couch.  and then hell set in for him (and me, for a second round, because he was sick, get it?)

church was great, until the plague told me it wasn't anymore.  that is what the plague does, you see?  it tells you when you feel good, and then suddenly, it's like "not anymore, punk!!" because the plague really talks like that.  i am sure it is getting back at me for every time i have said "dude" or "punk" whether affectionately or sincerely to another person.

needless to say, me and the two oldest kiddos high-tailed it back home.

and such has been my health these past days, resembling a pendulum.

merrill, on the other hand, is dying, i am sure.

the weird bit, like super weird (don't make fun of my lack of vocabulary skills, they are currently stuck, held captive by copious amounts of snot stored somewhere in my head.  like seriously, there is a lot, and i have no idea where it is located, or where it comes from, there is an obscene amount of it.  sorry for the image.), is that we cannot sleep!  i have not allowed my poor self a nap in days, because my body takes that time i spent napping, multiplies it by 3, and then puts off my bedtime by that amount in hours.  it sucks.  but for some reason, i can't sleep?


not fair.

neither can merrill, which makes it that much worse.  our house is handicapped with two junked-up parents.

(not that we were exceptional to begin with.)

so here comes the part where my mother calls me and chastises me.

it's good, it involves facebook.

i mentioned the aforementioned "handicap" existing in our household on the old social networking site, and received both sympathies and interesting offers.  apparently, my mom, didn't see it until today.

(insert a janet-sized chastisement here.)
(just teasing mom, i love you.)
(but really, it's not so much teasing as it is sleep-deprivation.)
(or maybe the violent amounts of snot.)

she wished that i would have called her to tell her i was sick, so she could help and so forth.  in all honesty, i don't think i was capable of calling her.  that nyquil messes me up!  besides that, if i did call her, it would have been to whine, and i tell you, she doesn't need to hear my stuffy-nosed voice whine. 

it's not attractive.

so she found out that her most favorite daughter was sick, on facebook, which led us to a rather interesting conversation that ended with the topic of snot, wouldn't you know.

and now, let me tell you of the things that are entirely too annoying when one is not feeling well.

- the menu music, that plays over and over when a child leaves a dvd stuck on the menu screen with an unconscious parent in the room, on the couch, stuck there, unconscious.  listening to it play  over, and over, and over...

- while extracting compressed files, they keep opening, one right after the other, right when i am ready to click extract.  i know another one will open right when i am ready to click "extract".  it is most definitely going to happen, but it buuuugs.

- hearing merrill clear his throat.  bless his heart.
- children who run around, screeching, giggling, and tattling.  sure, it is an everyday occurrence around here, but those copious amounts of snot, really leave little room for the ordinary things to be tolerated inside my crowded head.

and last, and most perhaps least in the categorizing of annoyances would have to be the many political candidates calling, reminding responsible citizens about voting and caucus (giggle) meetings and so forth.  seriously, i can't wait for this election season to be done and gone.  the phone ringing and interrupting my nyquil coma for this, is not cool.

sorry about the snot imagery and all.

my mom will probably call me and chastise me again for that...
(but really mom, love you.)


Ally's Corner said...

You gave me a good laugh today. I hope you guys are feeling better soon.

Julie said...

I hope the "plague" makes a quick exit from your home in the very near future. Thanks for the fun imagery though.

Bits and Pieces of Me...Emily! said...

I hope you feel better soon! I can't take that nasty green stuff, it wires me and I can't sleep! I wish I lived closer! I would have rescued you! Or at least brought a diet coke! :)

Jocelyn said...

The plague is definitely not a fun thing to have...let alone have it with kids and a sick husband!!!! But you still gave me a giggle as I read this today. I am praying for you to kick the plague's butt!!! And I too wish I was close so I could help you out!!!

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